1. Sanibel To Gloucester To Portugal

20 March 2019

Why Portugal?   People have asked me recently.   Why?  Here’s three good reasons:

1.      Portugal is as off-the-beaten track as any country in western Europe so it just seems like it might be relatively exotic.  Anyone who has been there has raved about the people and the beauty.

2.     Trump’s approval ratings are ticking, of all places, upward.   Upward?   Good time to take a break from the US.

3.     Recent stay at a La Quinta in Savannah would drive anyone someplace else.  A typical La Quinta is pooch friendly, cheap and reasonably dependable so we checked in to La Quinta in Savannah Sunday night, March 18th.  After showering and getting our heads screwed on from the drive through FLA and Georgia we met Jamaica for dinner.  A nice time at a place call Bonefish and when I asked Jamaica what Bonefish tasted like, both ladies jumped on me for being so stupid since there is no such a thing as Bonefish and that Bonefish was just the name of the restaurant.   This will be my life as I get older and dumber. 

After dinner and back at the La Quinta we were ready to turn in and tune out.   But rest was not on the agenda.   The room next door had at least four people having a good time chatting away and laughing at the loudest volume possible for a civil conversation.  They didn’t sound like they were drunk, they sounded like they were just having a good time.  I couldn’t understand anything and at times the yelling almost sounded confrontational, but there was too much laughing to worry about a fight breaking out.  They were clearly having a good time.  Maria and I sat on our bed for about fifteen minutes hoping the volcanic chit chat would blow over but it didn’t.  Since it was clear that no amount of drugs would get us to sleep in that environment,  I headed down to the lobby and explained to the desk lady that while our neighbors weren’t doing anything wrong and that there was no need to bother them, we’d really like another room.  Wanika, the very nice desk lady,  told me that while she’d give us another room she’d have to talk to the people in that room about the rukus. 

Here’s the thing about the possible talk to them about their rukus.   We’d just driven out of a “Stand Your Ground State” and we were now in Georgia.  Although Maria and I were married in Georgia almost fifty two years ago,  I can’t shake the suspicion that  Georgia might have that stand-your-ground attitude and who knows where that attitude might go if a party is broken up by an old, tired, balding fart.  My stick figure self did not  want to be part of that scene.   So I told Wanika that we’d try to make do and not to bother the partiers. 

Back in the room, fifteen minutes later with no sign of the maelstrom letting up, I got curious and put my ear on the wall and heard the following:  “Motherfuck, its just that women take so much fucking stimulation to have an orgasm!” to which two women in the room roared with laughter and yelled at the guy, insulting him for being so stupid………………….I almost collapsed in shock and laughter, but stimulation and orgasms notwithstanding, this could be an extremely long and strange evening.  It was definitely time to get another room.

Back to the lobby I went and in a quiet, furtive voice of conspiracy that could barely be heard I whispered to Wanika “If I do ask for another room, do you talk to the party people before we switch rooms or after?”  Wanika said she’d talk to them after we switched, which was the most correct answer possible.  It took us about ten minutes to lug all our stuff to the other end of the La Quinta.   On the way down the hall on one of the round trips, I saw another older couple heading towards the area of the rooms we were leaving and I really should have told them to turn around but I didn’t.  By the time I thought of it, they were already in their room, across the hall from the party.   We had a pretty good sleep and 4:30AM the next morning we were back on the road.  Arrived in Gloucester today and we are ready for Portugal tomorrow.

A Nice Quiet Evening